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You don't want it to be someone you know and you don't want it to be someone better than you.

I have a feeling that what you are about to go through is punishment enough. ] Elaine, you always care when an ex-girlfriend dates. You could put that fancy mustard on a shoe and it would taste pretty good to me. Now the bus tour, which is real, takes to places that, while they are real, they are not real in sense that they did not *really* happen to the *real* Peterman which is you.

Well, I knew any delay is gonna cost her her pinky toe, so I got out of the seat and I started walking towards him. : Say you got a big job interview, and you're a little nervous.

He says, "Where do you think you're going, Cracker Jack? Well, throw back a couple shots of Hennigans and you'll be as loose as a goose and ready to roll in no time.

: It became very clear to me sitting out there today that every decision I've made in my entire life has been wrong. While the latter is obviously impossible, the former still applies. Since when are you not allowed to ask a Chinese man where a Chinese restaurant is? The final scene's callback to Seinfeld's first episode is a cute touch, but it's not enough to save "The Finale"'s reputation as one of Seinfeld's lowest points. sitting around waiting for someone in a hotel lobby. Elaine's sexy-voice answering-machine prank in this episode is mildly humorous, but the collective horndog mentality displayed by Jerry, George, and Kramer runs contrary to the show’s established platonic-frenemy dynamic. The plot of "The Susie," a mistaken-identity tale taken four or five steps too far, seems impressive at first, but in the end there are no failures or successes — just confusion. Not even the minor revelation that George cheated during "The Contest" can save what is an uninspired parade of guest stars and forgotten characters. An episode about sitting around waiting for someone in a hotel lobby, “The Jacket” offers all the thrills of … Peterman at the end of this episode — but Peterman doesn't get it, and neither does the audience. One of a few episodes in Seinfeld's early seasons that temporarily upsets the show's dynamic, the season-three finale sees Kramer flee to L. A.-centric episode "The Trip," though Kramer's Murphy Brown cameo at the end provides perfect punctuation. (The closest they come is Estelle's "I find my son treating his body like it was an amusement park" remark, which still kills.) Peerless TV, no question.: Well then, from out of nowhere, a huge tidal wave lifted me, tossed me like a cork, and I found myself right on top of him - face to face with the blowhole. I could barely see from the waves crashing down upon me but I knew something was there. They bring 'em in, they sit 'em down, and they tell you - 'these are your friends!

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So now, when the phone rings, you have to answer "Vandelay Industries". If people would only look to the cookie, all our problems would be solved. You don't even really realize that there is a party. Both birthday parties, people have to kinda help you blow out the candles, you can't do it... Plant yourself there, because you will hear the funniest stories you've ever heard. Every proctologist story ends in the same way: "It was a million to one shot, Doc.